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February 9, 2012

Permissive parenting: Good or bad?

Permissive parenting is a technique that respects the individuality of kids. In this method, you decide to permit a child to grow up naturally with freedom from unnecessary parental interference in life. Thus, the child is exempted from high expectations of the parents in spite of living in a close knit family structure. But permissive parenting is also not totally free from negative aspects. The concept of too much freedom of kids, turns out to be its greatest drawbacks in certain situations. Thus, the debate persists whether permissive parenting will be good to adopt or it should be discarded altogether. We have tried to bring about an amicable solution to this debate. Have a look.

Permissive parenting: The essence

1. Kids grow up more independently

Since permissive parenting renders an atmosphere of freedom for the kids, they grow up to be more self sufficient. Unlike many other systems of parenting, you will have lesser chances of seeing your kid run after you for every small thing he needs. Kids in such an atmosphere have greater ability to take decisions on their own and think constructively. The only reason behind this is that right from their tender years they do not cling on to their parents every time they are in a fix. Kids get greater room to develop their inherent genius.

2. Kids have greater power of judgment

When you apply permissive parenting technique on your kid, you can be assured that your child will have a greater insight into human characters. Permitting freedom will help him or her to understand who is good and who is bad. Probably, this is what you will like to see in your kid when he or she matures. This capability will assist your kid to be able to avoid bad influences and negative associations during his growing and transitional years.

3. Your kid will have less psychological issues

Your kid will never thrust in any adverse psychological situation like depression, stress, phobia and anxiety. Since, parents do not have any expectations from their offspring in return of their parental duties, kids are not cast in extreme pressure. Neither are they forced to obtain high marks nor are they asked to be the toppers in their academics. Thus, they get enough of space to prosper naturally and develop their own skills.

4. Kids naturally develop the sense of self regulation

If you adopt the system of permissive parenting, you will allow your kid to enjoy freedom of space. It is also the undeniable truth that your close knit family structure will keep on creating a positive feeling for the family. In this method, you allow your kid to understand the protocols of your family. The realization in the kid gets embedded naturally and not with force. Therefore, your kid will value the demands of the family and possess the power of self regulation.

5. Kids grow confident

When you decide upon adopting permissive parenting, you should avoid the use of words that will discourage your kid. Instead, your new vocabulary should include positive words to encourage him in every sphere of his life. The most positive aspect of this kind of behavior is that your kid will never feel that he or she is unworthy and incapable. Rather, your positive inspiration will always instill confidence in him.

Permissive parenting: The criticism

1. Some kids grow up as underachievers

Since your parental control is always slack towards your kid, he or she might grow up as an underachiever. The inherent potential of your kid might not get expressed to the optimum level as you do not have any expectation from him or her. As the kid is aware that you will not force him or her about anything, he might develop a careless attitude towards life. This will get reflected adversely in his or her academic result, extracurricular activities and overall performance.

2. Indifference towards parents is common

There are kids who become indifferent towards their parents as they grow up. Permissive parenting demands that you must fulfill your basic duties as parents. But you must not expect anything in return from them. This is viable to make them grow uncontrollable and demanding. Do not even be surprised, if your son or daughter turns out to be a spoilt brat.

3. Kids who are not self starters will not get benefitted

Permissive parenting cannot be applied for every kid. You might have a kid who is talented and sober too. But he or she is introvert and passive in nature. Permissive parenting will be futile for him or her. Setting the kid in an atmosphere of uninterrupted freedom will make the kid shrink further.

4. Kids take up wrong practices

The basic rule of permissive parenting is to allow your kid to enjoy his or her life. But some kids end up in circumstances that parents never expected out of them. A first time venture of addiction or sexual activity can eventually become the habit of the kid. The basic reason is that permissive parents take these as mere experiments of adolescence and remain indifferent to all these. They further feel that these attractions will go away with time. Addictions always has a strong influence in life of kids than family values. So, too much of leniency might be harmful for you and your kid too.

5. Kids develop distance with parents

Although you might think that your child is happy with your style of permissive parenting, it can be the opposite way too. You might feel it is best to be indifferent about the personal life of your kid and not expect anything from him or her. But if your kid is sentimental, he or she might misunderstand you. The child will think that you do not bother about him or her at all. This might gradually create a distance between you and your kid.



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